Lesson 9  -  Understanding Sentence Problems

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In this lesson you will learn how to recognize these sentence problems: choppy sentences, run-on sentences, and stringy sentences.

Choppy Sentences - Choppy sentences are sentences that are too short. When several short sentences come together they force the reader to go slowly. This makes the writing seem more "elementary" than it truly is.

Examples
Choppy Sentences Our home was in a beautiful valley. It was far back. It was in the rugged Ozarks.
Corrected  Our home was in a beautiful valley far back in the rugged Ozarks.

Choppy Sentences The house was made of logs. It was nestled at the edge of the foothills. It was in the mouth of a small canyon. It was surrounded by a grove of trees. They were huge red oaks.
Corrected  The log house was nestled at the edge of the foothills in the mouth of a small canyon, and was surrounded by a grove of huge red oaks.

Run-On Sentences  - A run-on is when when two or more sentences are combined without connecting words or punctuation.

Brain Pop - Movie on run-on sentences http://www.brainpop.com/english/grammar/runonsentences/

Examples
Run-on  Billy learned about raccoons, Billy studied their habits and he came to learn they were tricky creatures.
Corrected  Billy learned about raccoons. Billy studied their habits, and he came to learn they were tricky creatures.

Run-on  Grandpa told Billy stories about coon hunting he taught him how to build a coon trap.
Corrected  Grandpa told Billy stories about coon hunting, and he taught him how to build a coon trap.

Run-on  Billy hunted during the night he slept during the day.
Corrected  Billy hunted during the night, so he slept during the day.
Corrected  Because Billy hunted during the night, he slept during the day.

Stringy Sentences - sentence with too many clauses usually connected with and, but, so, and because, forming one very long sentence. Stringy sentences are so long the reader forgets the beginning of the sentence before reaching the end.

Example
Stringy  The fame of my dogs spread all over our part of the Ozarks, and they were the best in the country, so that no coon hunter came into my grandfather's store with as many pelts as I did.
Corrected The fame of my dogs spread all over our part of the Ozarks. They were the best in the country. No coon hunter came into my grandfather's store with as many pelts as I did.

Practice: Write choppy, run-on, or stringy to describe which sentence problem each sentence below contains.

1. ____________________________ I arrived at the millhouse. I tied my mule to the hitching post. I took my corn. I set it by the door.
2. ____________________________ Rubin was two years older than I was, and he was big and husky for his age, and he never had much to say although he had mean-looking eyes that were set far back in his rugged face.
3. ____________________________ Rainie was the youngest he had the meanest disposition of any boy I had ever known.
4. ____________________________ He snatched the candy out of my hand. He ate it. Then he sneered at me. He said it wasn't good.
5. ____________________________ The boys entered the store they stopped and glared at me.
6. ____________________________ When the last of my corn was just going through the grinding stones, Grandpa pushed a lever to one side, shutting off the power, and then he came over and asked Rainie why he was looking for trouble, and asked him why he was always looking for a fight.
7. ____________________________ He's an old-timer folks call him the "ghost coon".
8. ____________________________ A strange little smile was tugging at the corner of his mouth the big artery in his neck was pounding out and in.
9. ____________________________ I could hear him chuckling as he walked toward his store, and I thought to myself that there goes the best grandpa a boy ever had, and that is just what I thought of my grandpa.
10. ____________________________ I did not want to argue I carried both the lantern and the ax.
11. ____________________________ A bird chirped. A rabbit ran. Mallards took flight. I whooped to my dogs.
12. ____________________________ The wily old coon crossed the river several times I couldn't shake my dogs from his trail.